I've been busy for weeks, burning the candle at both ends and mysteriously tired at the same time... Days are long, nights are longer when there's a market to prepare for and although they are fun and rewarding, I wonder if they are worth it. Its these tired and stretched times where I find myself questioning why I do all this...
My sister gave me this beautiful vintage book by Anita Lobel for Christmas many years ago. She said the story reminded her of me. Its about a woman who makes beautiful things for other people, but doesn't necessarily find it fulfilling as more and more demands are placed on her...
She misses making beautiful things for her own family. It was when I was reading this book to the owlets the other night that it struck a chord and I realised that I'm in a similar predicament. Totally self inflicted, of course. I already attempt to do lots, home educating two owlets among other things, and without much regular support from extended family, having chosen to exile ourselves on this beautiful island. Its a full time job - and a half. So then add to it making things for markets and the rest and you have one busy, overworked mama. So much to do - so little ME!! Like the Seamstress of Salzburg, I miss making beautiful things for my loved ones. When my owlets see another pretty thing leave my sewing machine and ask if its for them and are met with "no, its for other children" and their faces drop... its shattering. I just need more time!!! I can't make more, so something has to give. So... I'm winding it back a bit. I'm cutting back the markets I do to about four in the next year. You may see some new things in the owlet shops from time to time, and other places out and about, but there will be more crafting for loved ones and in particular my owlets, because that's what gives my little family the most pleasure... Staying in the moment.
Great post Lauren. That sounds like a very wise approach... I hope you can find the balance and keep the enjoyment flowing when you create.
ReplyDeleteThat's why I decided not to try to sell anything. I know if I do that I won't love it anymore and my kids will NEVER get anything handmade from me (it's hard enough atm with making pressies for other kids that my kids want). Sounds very sensible to me!
ReplyDeleteAnd fair enough too :-)
ReplyDeleteGood on you. I imagine it was probably a hard decision, but hopefully it will be satisfying! I'm sure your little people will be very happy.
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